Exploring new worlds

As the due date for our little girl gets closer, I find myself getting my feet wet in the new world of parenting and fatherhood.   Allison amazes me.. she's read like 3 "what to expect" type books as well as several other "new mom" books.  I have one that I haven't started reading yet and still intend to get to "Parenting for Dummies" or "The Idiot's Guide to Having a Baby".. it's one of those.. can't remember which one... but I got it free through Freecycle.

Anyway... another thing I find myself doing is reading Amazon's blog posts (which includes a children/baby/parenting section).  Today, I'm browsing through the new posts and I find one related to Dr. Toy... that's not her real name, but rather her nickname but it led me to her website which I found fascinating.  Her focus is that choosing the right toys for children can enhance their growth, their development, and their creativity.   Is it sad that I'm looking forward to playing with baby toys?

So for any other new parents out there... here you go:

 http://www.drtoy.com/main/index.html

The Seven Dwarves of Pregnancy

My co-worker sent me this and I thought it was cute! Though I think the one dwarf is supposed to be "Bloated" not "Boated"!!

Baby Gymnastics

As you can tell from the post below, our little girl has been very active lately. Particularly when she hears dogs barking...that's just started in the last week or so. Last night she was the most active she's been...she acutally pushed up against my belly, moving the book I was resting there. It was wild....the first time I thought....Holy Cow! There really is a tiny little human being in there! Ryan was so psyched. It was adorable...he put his head to my belly and started talking to her and sure enough, she kicked his head a few times. It was such a touching few minutes for me...it really hit me that we're starting this little family here and that's so exciting.

I have also found what might be as great an invention as the Bella Band...it's the bra extender. I have grown from a C/D cup to a DD cup, so I bought a few new bras. However, they felt tight and constricting and gave me stomach aches. I was at Motherhood Maternity on Sunday buying some jeans, and the woman told me about these magic little extenders. I've been wearing them for two days now and I am in heaven! I'm still uncomfortable by the end of the day, but for the rest of the day I feel no pain. It's amazing!

Not much else to report really...my health has been great in general. A few stomach issues here and there, but nothing too bad. I have to be careful with overdoing it now...spent most of the day Saturday cleaning and had serious back pain that night and into Sunday. Also learning that heels are no longer my best friend. Not that I won't still wear them, but...everything in moderation, right?! Have my next doctor's appointment on Monday...then we leave the following Sunday for Key West. Busy busy! This weekend will be low key though...just me and my copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows...baby's gonna get her Harry Potter fix! Now there's an idea-we could get the audio books of all the Harry Potters and play them for the baby...hmmm....

What's that noise?

Okay.. I'm kinda freakin' out here. Yesterday, I heard this really loud noise. I couldn't quite make it out... but it kinda sounded like "Ralph" or "Arf" or something like that. And then a short little like growly-howl. It coulda been a werewolf, I'm not quite sure. I tried to get mom's attention in case it was a werewolf.. it musta worked cause it stopped.

Then tonight.. I heard it again.. This time I really tried getting mom's attention, I pushed REAL hard against the inside of the cave. Then the noise stopped and I heard this steady stream of noise.. I think it sounded like people talking.. but I couldn't understand any of it. If you've ever played the Sims or heard them talk... that's what it kinda sounded like. Then it got louder and deeper and CLOSER. By this time, I've figured out that that must be dad's voice. I can make out mom's voice easily cause her's sounds all weird cause I hear it like it's on a loudspeaker inside the cave. Anyway. he rambles on for a while... I can't understand a word he's saying, I throw a fit and kick at him for while. I could make out a couple of words, though. Can't spell em but they sound like jipsahee and dahog and barg. Well whatever he said... the "Jipsahee Dahog that goes Barg" went quiet... (from now on I'll just refer to it as JipC for short).

It's been quiet for a while now so I think I'll take a nap.

Look at me - I'm growing

Finally got dad to upload a newer pic of me... the scan isn't much better than the first, but you can see me growing... :)

and no.. that is not a cigar in my mouth... it's part of my arm. Jeez...

Are you excited?

Recently, I put up a couple of ultrasound pics on my cube at work.  These were the ultrasounds that we had done several weeks ago and I finally got around to putting them up at work.  This morning one of the gals I work with stopped me in the hall and said "I saw your new baby pics, they're very cool."  At first, I was confused.. how could I have baby pics when I the baby isn't even born yet?  But then I realized that she was talking about the ultrasound pics.... Oh yeah.. those are nice.

 

They asked the usual questions...

 

When is it due?

Do you know what it is?

Are you excited?

 

I have no problems answering the first two questions... but that third one gets me every time.  I almost wish people wouldn't ask if I'm some specific adjective.... but go a little more general.. like "how do you feel?"... "what do you think about all this?"  Because I can't seem to answer a simple yes or no to "Are you excited?"  

 

How do you capture and describe the million different things you feel about becoming a father and having a baby.  A few weeks ago, I was looking at the baby registry that Allison had put together (and no, I can't take any credit for it) and I started to feel my chest compressing and I got really nervous, like I was having an anxiety attack.  "Oh my God.. I'm becoming a dad, oh my god, am I really ready for this?"   I'm sure these type of panic attacks are normal, but when you've never had them before they are quite frightening.   Sure, I'm excited about the prospect of being a dad.. but with that comes a lot of insecurity.  Will I be a good dad?  Will she trust me?  Will she confide in me?  Will I be a vessel of safety and security?  And on and on an on.

 

Everyone says the same thing.. you'll be fine... you'll be great.... once they say "Dada" for the first time or hug your leg.. and inside my mind, I know these things are true.. but knowing these things to be true doesn't ease the anxiety any.  Most of the time, I try not to think about it... which is easy for me because I'm not the pregnant one... but it's there in the back of my mind, along with the joy, anticipation, and the love I feel for me growing child.   

 

Most of the time, I just think about how I smother my dog... and think.. my little girl is going to be sooooo spoiled by me.